..... and I say 'kinda' ..... cuz what de arse was dat CAPRICORN costume?! ...... Capricorn suppose tuh turn yuh orn ...... not make yuh scorn! ...... I was real excited tuh see what dey woulda do wit my sign ..... but ugh ..... wha de hell!? ..... I vex!
Anyway ..... ah jumpin de gun ..... leh meh start from de top .....
Now everybody know ...... dat I eh no mas critic ...... an' ah doh even play mas ..... de lass time I play mas was in 2005 ..... so ..... when I go band launch an' ting ..... is mainly fuh de lime ...... and tuh maco lil bit ...... I eh no serious mas reviewer ..... like
Saucy ..... and
Afro Chic ...... and
Carnival Jumbie ..... me eh care if de costume make wit feather ..... or pleather!
But ..... reviewer or not ..... yuh know I always have ah 'view' ..... which after gettin meh chops sweeten-up ..... turned out tuh be one from de general crowd ...... and not from front stage!
An' ah know yuh doh understand shit dat ah jus say eh ..... so leh meh explain .....
Last week Wednesday ..... at exactlcy 7:10 am ..... I get ah text sayin dat YUMA want ah contact fuh me ..... cuz like dey want tuh invite meh tuh dey band launch .....
I now ..... I get confuse ...... cuz me eh know de person who was askin ..... an' she eh know me ..... so ah call fren
(who sen meh de text) tuh investiquire de scene ..... only tuh find out ..... dat it is not ME she wanted ah contact for ...... was WUZDESCENE!!!!
Well look ting ..... immediately yuh gyul start tuh like sheself ...... cuz was like SCENE REACH!!!
..... so ah promptly give fren meh email address tuh pass on ...... cuz dat is pips I was not about tuh pass up ......
A A ..... so Thursday reach now ...... an' every minute ah only checkin checkin meh email .....
Friday reach ...... ah still checkin meh email .....
Saturday reach ..... ah check it again .....
Sunday reach now ...... de day of de launch ..... and finally ...... SALT!!!! ..... no email ...... well meh bubble get good buss ..... cuz yeah ..... either de email get lorse in cyberspace ...... or Ms. Thang jus overs me ..... but ...... was no scene ...... cuz lucky fuh me ...... ah have a Young Upwardly Mobile Adult fren ..... who had handle meh from before ..... an' she handle meh right up too ...... even deliverin meh 'Me and Guest' invite directly tuh meh door .....
So wit invite in hand ..... outfit organise ..... money scrape up ...... and 'Guest' chain up ...... was time tuh head out ..... tuh The Greens in de Oval ..... a place I never hear about before ...... and a place dat I woulda never tink could accommodate ah party ......
So we reach dong de road now ...... at about 8:45 pm ...... an' it eh have no parkin ...... yep ..... King George wasn't available fuh parkin ...... so cars was park all over de place ...... it was so ram out ..... dat we end up parkin quite by Drink Wine Bar ......
Anyway ..... after taking a cool walk
(in 5" heels) ..... from Drink Wine Bar ...... tuh de western side of de Oval ....... we finally reach de entrance ..... which was real easy breezy ...... cuz I guess by that time everybody who was suppose tuh be there ...... was done already inside ..... so we walk tru de scaffoldin ting ...... de people by de door take de invite ..... den dey check someting or de odda on dey computer ..... and then they proceeded to put NO BAND on our wrists?!
(hmmm ..... clearly I wasn't handled as right up as I thought!) ..... den we had tuh walk down ah tunnel ting ...... and tank de lawd dat there was light at de end
(which was de actual party area) ..... as in ...... ah concrete floor ....... cuz I really tort ..... that that name ...... The Greens ...... meant we woulda be walkin on bush!!!
But back tuh de wrist band scene ..... apparently de bands was fuh a free drinks bar ..... which was ah kyna elevated tent ting as yuh enter de party ..... I guess it was a VIP section ...... fuh VIPs ...... like DE PRESIDENT who believe it or not ..... still partyin ..... and playin mas an' ting!!!
Right ...... so we on de inside now ...... and that's what we see ...... real people ....... and de stage ...... real far away!! ...... one time I start tuh study how de arse I gonna get pics from so far away!? ...... but I eh really dig nuttin ..... cuz at least de show didn't start yet ..... an' ah had time tuh scope out de scene ...... of course over a drink ...... which was another scene itself ..... cuz wow ..... de bars was real tizzick ...... by de time we get tru ...... was time fuh de show tuh start .....
So wit showtime announced over de PA ..... ah walk up de side ..... tuh see how de front was lookin ...... and lo and behold ..... it was real easy ...... no kyna hot and sweaty ramness or nuttin ...... so ah set up shop right in de front ...... well ..... actually ...... left in de front!
De show start now ...... and de first ting we go see is ah setta smoke ...... like if de place bunnin down ...... so of course when de first model come out on de stage ..... all yuh seein is smoke .... wit a hint of a human!? ...... needless tuh say ..... ah get lil peeved ...... cuz my camera eh have no SMOKE setting ...... it have a red eye setting ..... it have a behind glass setting ..... it have ah fireworks setting ..... but it don't have no SMOKE setting ...... so yuh done know how my first setta pics come out ...... jus like dat .....
Den ..... by de time de smoke had clear out ...... muzbe about 3 sections ...... had done parade ...... so I eh get none of de early costumes ...... den ..... when de air get back real clear ..... an' ah coulda finally see properly ...... de models now ..... well dem start tuh move like dey set dem on 'speedy' ....... cuz by de time I point de camera ..... and de focus ..... focus ...... an' I press tuh shoot ...... was only backside I was gettin ..... models makin dey way off de stage .....
Den ..... models modellin left, right and centre ..... and nobody eh know what on de stage ..... cuz fuh like de first 10 minutes of de show ..... nobody was announcin de section ...... and is not like yuh coulda figure out what was on de stage ..... cuz HELLO ..... wit de exception of Leo
(which I love) ...... it didn't have no odda section dat was self-explanatory ..... and I doh know if dat was by design ..... I doh know if maybe de desginers didn't want tuh come across too literal ..... cuz there I was thinking dat is de Zodiac .... and dat all de signs have ah birthstone ..... so maybe de costumes woulda probably follow de birthstone colour ...... like garnet fuh CAPRICORN ..... instead of dat awful black and gold
(sorry I'm more of a black and silver gal) ..... let's just say ...... nuttin had anyting tuh do wit nuttin ...... colours didn't connect wit de sign ..... designs didn't depict de sign ..... de band coulda easily be called ...... RAINBOW ..... but ..... that said ..... as far as feathers and beads and thongs go ...... most of de costumes were awesome!!!
It was also very blatant too ...... dat in de band YUMA ..... not all Zodiac signs are equal ..... some were definitely more equal than others ...... with fantastically elaborate frontline costumes ..... or individuals or whatever ...... like Scorpio ..... and Leo ...... and The Oracle ..... and den some was lookin like ah lagniappe ...... like CAPRICORN ..... cuz what was dem tings swallowin de gyul two arms? ..... and what was dem tings on de gyul legs ..... nobody cyah play mas in dat ..... not even de model coulda play she mas in it!!
Then there was de abundance of ...... ASS ...... yes ..... yuh read right ..... ASS ...... cuz watch meh ...... I doh know if was my imagination ...... but real backsides was rollin on de stage ...... I swear all de models had orn thongs ....... not that that was a problem ..... cuz the men were certainly havin ah time ..... only oooooohing ..... and ahhhhing ...... and rayin ..... and clapin!!
And as ah on de topic of models and dey bumbum ...... what was de big deal wit de foreign use MTV model?!
(other than her bumbum) ...... ah mean ..... yeah ..... she nice ...... but HELLO ...... she eh want nuttin wit our Teri-Leigh Bovell ..... I woulda put Teri over her any day ..... too bad Teri couldn't don de model hat too ..... cuz is den de show woulda mash up ..... cuz come on .... let's be honest ..... Teri is ah bess ting ..... it eh have no hotter costume model dan Teri!!!
Then there was the music ...... which was not soca
*thank you* ..... which I thoroughly enjoyed ..... altho most would say ..... dat is ah band launch ...... and dey shoulda play soca
*yawn - tired argument* ...... de music was real pumpin ..... and I was real groovin .... and de lil eventual soca session dat dey end off wit ...... was a good move ..... so nobody cyah say ...... dat dey didn't play no soca at all .....
But hear nah ..... yuh know me ..... I could go orn and orn and orn ..... so leh meh wrap it up ..... cuz it late ..... and I want tuh go an' sleep .....
All in all ...... de vibes was nice ...... de party wasn't too ram ..... it was jus right ....... it had real WHO'S WHO ..... among de WHO'S YOU? ...... and de DJ play real good music ...... but most of all ..... de presentation was short and sweet ..... and de costumes WOWED me again
(kudos tuh de designers) ..... so now we wait ...... on de awakening of
de website ..... de opening of de mas camp ..... and de surprise of de prices!!
Look de pics dat ah take ..... doh mind dat dey doh have no captions eh ..... is jus dat ah doh know what is what!
PS: .... fuh real carnival reviews ..... check out Trinidad Carnival Diary ..... Chronicles of Afro Chic ..... and Carnival Jumbie .....