De big football match ... from where I sat!
So ….. de phenomenally, hyped, ‘on steroids’ football match …… TnT vs England ….. which was billed as ‘de grudge match’ …… cuz ‘we have a score tuh settle’ wit England ..... fuh cheatin we in de las World Cup ……. and which was organized to celebrate de 100th anniversary of de TTFF …… come and gorn …….. and boy was dat score settled! ……. we geh licks fuh so …... 3/NIL …. de match was real CRAP!!!
Oooooops …….. da’is de end of de post!!
REEEEEEWIND!
I didn’t go ……. I opted to watch the match on my new HD TV ….. in my new post-workmen living room ….. besides ….. Chris Brown comin and girlfren need all de funds she could scrape up!!! 
…… the match was aired live on NCC Channel 4 …… and like dey cameras was dirty ….. cuz de picture wasn’t clear at all ……. not even de HD coulda help …… den tuh top dat off …….. de commentary was British …. and very biased …. imagine .... in just the first few minutes of de match ....... Mr. Commentator go blurt out .... dat is no way England could lose …. the pomposity!!!
Anyway …... de TV coverage began with the players emerging from the tunnel (oh what pride!) ….. and continued with de national anthems on sweet pan …... and from what we saw on TV …… I could only imagine the euphoria in de stadium ..…. and de pride dat de crowd muzbe was feelin ….. there was not an empty seat in sight …... coming tuh think of it …... there were no clear aisles either ….. looks like all the bogus ticketholders eventually got in …… with de 23,000 legit ones! …… and although I could not picture a patriotic trini crowd …….. in any other colour than ‘red’ ….. they looked resplendent in their white ….. I think it was the first time I ever saw trini supporters (of anything) decked in white …. and the stadium itself looked like those ‘away’ ….. wit all de ads lining de stands …... we wuz lookin good ….. we wuzin playin too good …. but we look real good!
5:30 De game start …. and so did the rain (in Diego) 5:33 David Beckham get ah free kick 5:37 Kenwyn Jones get knock down by de English goalkeeper (James) …. and never played again 5:41 Darryl Roberts substitute Kenwyn Jones Ah blasted helicopter just pass over meh house … oh shit .... what dey lookin for ..... everybody in de Stadium!!! 5:42 England scores (Barry) 5:43 England scores AGAIN! (Defoe) 5:48 De chupid crowd start ah wave …. Steups! 5:49 De British commentators pissin me off …. they’re talking about how Dwight Yorke ..... who retired from international football after our World Cup bid in 2006 ….. is actually here ..... and will make a kind of valedictory appearance ….. then they laugh (very heartily) and comment that after de performance put out so far ..… he probably eh go feel tuh play again!!! …. Steups to commentary by foreigners! ….. dey sounding like de US coverage weez get of de Olympics! 5:52 Camera just zoomed in on Dwight Yorke …. and de dotish commentators are at it again … sayin dat he doh look too happy and that its rear to see him without a smile on his face ….. Steups! …. Please ….. put a sock in it!!! Defoe nearly score again! …. LAWD he real livin up tuh his name bwoy! …. he really turning out tuh be ‘De Foe’ of the TnT team!!! 5:54 TnT get ah free kick …. dey wase it! 5:56 Rio Ferdinand down …. dey bring a stretcher fuh him …. and he jump back up quick quick 5:57 Steven Gerrard (England) get a yellow card ….. and TnT get a free kick (for which the crowd gave a standing ovation) …. dey wase it! 6:01 Darryl Roberts nearly score! ….. SALT! 6:03 Beckham get ah corner 6:07 Stern John nearly score! .... SALT! 6:15 THE FIRST HALF DONE – TNT 0 ENG 2 6:32 De game start back wit ah setta substitutions …. England bring on 4 new players (Crouch, Hart, Jagielka and Bentley) ….. and TnT bring on jus 2 (Telesford, Smith) ….. Beckham and Ferdinand were benched! …. Peter Crouch get boo cuz he used our Brent Sancho’s dreadlocks tuh score one of dey goals against us in de World Cup in 2006 6:34 Camera zoom in on Dwight Yorke again ….. he really eh lookin too thrilled! .... he eh feelin dem loomin losin vibes at all!!! 6:36 OK ..... 'De Foe' he is ....... 'De Enemy' …. yuh know he score AGAIN! 6:39 We nearly score ..... Steups ..... SALT! 6:40 ‘De Foe’ nearly score again! …. NAH! ..... he crazy!!! …. he like de English version of our 'little magician' ..... cuz he smally and shorty jus like he .... 6:44 Young come on fuh England …. another substitution Peter Crouch nearly score 6:45 David Bentley take ah corner 6:47 David Bentley nearly score 6:54 We had a good chance to score ….. Hart …. de English goalkeeper was nowhere near de goal …. of course ……. SALT! 6:58 Stern John was substituted wit Forbes 7:02 Dwight Yorke finally get ah bligh …. WOW ….. ah whole 20 minutes play! 7:11 England substitute again …. dey bring on Warnock …… fuh a corbeaux sweat! 7:17 3 minutes of extra time starts now .... is bess dey had jus end de game here ..... cuz is no way we coulda score 3 ..... or even 4 goals ..... in 3 MINUTES! 7:20 IT’S ALL OVER …. WE LORSE …. BAD BAD BAD!!!! … 3/NIL
Dis is ah jokey TV shot .... our boys (and supporters) wore white .... England
wore red ...
Anyway ….. fuh those of you who were there ….. but drunk ….. and for those of you who weren’t …. cuz yuh eh even in trini ….. here’s a lil commentary ….. from a clueless female perspective:
OK …… so yuh could go back tuh de beginnin of dis post now ……. WE LORSE!!! …… but ….. yuh know us ..... I’m sure it was no love lorse …… cuz trinis probably flocked tuh all de bars and clubs and pubs last nite …. tuh drown dey sorrows …… woulda make no sense goin home tuh do dat!
I end up going tuh de lil ‘after party’ ……. at de castle on Chancellor Hill …… tuh hobnob wit de ‘Prince of Port of Spain’ ……. and de Soca Warriors ……. down tuh Jack Warner an all make de turn ….. fuh one night only …… yuh gyul went from "WHO’S YOU?" …… tuh "WHO’S WHO" …… a jolly good time was had by all …… and we end off de nite ….. wit de lil ‘Player’s Ball’ in de Zen!
Next on de agenda is SEX AND THE CITY ……. Oh gorm ah cyah wait! …….. and more football fever ……. TnT vs Jamaica ……. June 7.
PS: ah hear Gary Hunt geh 'BOO' when dey introduce him ….. an’ ah still doh have no internet …. so ah went by fren tuh get meh lil fix ….. YOU KNOW ..... as I start tuh check meh email ….. CURRENT GORN!!! …. 7:40 to 9:30 (1 hour 50 minutes!!!)
Look de man who cause all de hype in de first place! .......
Captain ..... David Beckham ..... being interviewed after de match 
Jermaine Defoe .... he real geh orn!!!
... and our very own football star ..... Dwight Yorke ..... takin ah
lil pic wit ah fan!
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