I have subscriptions to the 3 dailies ...... and I normally read them in a particular order ....... Express first ..... Newsday second ..... and Guardian third ....... reason being ...... I've always considered the Express to be the bearer of serious news ..... and the Newsday ...... to be the bearer of de same news .... but in its raw, grassroots form .... wit gory pics an ting ..... and den there's de Guardian ...... dat I get only on weekends and public holidays ...... cuz dey used tuh lapse too much on delivery .... so ah cut dem dong.

Anyway ..... wit dat said ...... by now you would have realised .... dat most of my days ...... start off wit ah healthy dose of papers (and sometimes not so healthy) ..... oh ..... and a steaming hot cup of coffee too!

This morning ..... ah doh know what possess meh ..... but ah decide tuh read de Guardian first ..... and continue backwards tuh de Express ...... well dat turned out tuh be ah wrong move ...... cuz ah end up startin off meh day ..... wit ah 'wrong' article ....... and ah setta 'wrong' feelings start tuh ensue ...... SHOCK ....... is de only word ..... ah could find ..... tuh describe how I felt ...... when halfway tru de Guardian ....... an article on 'Anal Sex' ..... jumped out at me ...... ah whole page! ...... wit an accompanying picture of ah big, round, apple bumsee ....... ah tell mehself ...... never me and reading de papers backwards again! ...... cuz how coincidental was it ..... dat de same day ...... I decide tuh go backwards ...... dey went backwards too ...... wit ah story bout goin eeeen tru de backdoor?! ...... anyway ..... as much as I was baffled ...... as to the relevance of such a topic ...... especially in de Sunday newspaper of all places ...... I was also intrigued ...... so of course ...... ah read it ..... if only tuh see if ah could learn someting ...... it was a very funny article ..... I mean ...... I don't think it was meant to come across as a jokey ...... but it did ..... it was extremely gross too ..... also covering the 'not so glamorous side' like contracting infections and diseases etc ...... I have to say ....... it really opened my eyes ...... and immediately closed off other parts!!!

OK ...... now I don't really know where I want to go with this post ....... cuz as I said ..... I did learn a thing or two ...... but what was more pressing on my mind ..... was the fact that children too ...... read papers ....... so did the Guardian really think this through ...... is an article on anal sex appropriate to publish in ah Sunday papers ...... or in any newspapers fuh dat matter ..... cuz it was pretty graphic ...... nothing seemed 'taboo' ..... it talked about the risks ...... and how tuh reduce dem ...... and it even presented ideas ..... and methods ...... to achieve a successful bull ...... is this what we want our children reading ...... call me a prude ....... but I think not! ..... now I know dat some would argue ...... dat dis same crap can be easily obtained on de internet ..... but that's different ...... a child would have tuh actually go seek it out ..... it eh splash ...... on de computer screen ....... as dey turn orn de computer ..... like how it splash ...... on ah whole page ...... in dey Sunday newspapers!!! ..... what were they thinking???!!!!

Anyway ...... look de online version here (wit de whole 'risks and how tuh reduce dem' bit missin) ...... and look some actual quotes from de article ...... dat were quite interesting! 

• I ent doin dat, de anus was never made for something to go in, only for something to come out
• It's not an entry point, it's an exit
• It's perverse, I don't think God will endorse that
• You have to be very careful or you will get hurt.  But if he's doing it right, and you're very relaxed, you have the most intense orgasms.
• Men who have to be 'talked into it', secretly want to do it cuz you can't convince a man to try anything sexual that he doesn't want 'to do'
• Too much trouble, it took 7 minutes and I wasn't anywhere near in
• Sex for me is not just about filing a hole, I have sex cuz I like vaginas
• I think men who like anal sex are gay and would secretly like to be having sex with a man
• What is nice about it, is that you have to take your time.  You absolutely can't rush it and it makes me feel good to know that he is willing to take the time to get me ready 

PS:  Miss Universe on tonight! ....... go Anya!