If I were a BOY ....
Oh gorm ah love that song!
But is not what yuh tinkin ...... I will NEVER want to be a boy!!!
Something happened today ...... actually ....... it's something that happens nearly every day ...... but today ...... I was able to capture it ...... and ....... when I captured it ...... I wondered to myself ..... if I were a boy ...... what would I do?
Around 2:40 this afternoon ...... ah was cruising on Sierra Leone Road (Diego) ....... headin tuh de Petit Valley Main Road ..... when ....... in the distance ...... ah notice ah lil pile up ....... ah didn't want tuh believe dat is traffic ...... at dat hour of de day! ...... then ...... as I got closer ...... well ah didn't want tuh believe what was causing de pile up either!!!
Imagine dat nasty, stinkin, man below ..... like he had tuh pee sooo bad ...... dat he jus STOP his car ..... in de road (de same road dat cars have tuh drive in) ....... jump out de car ...... calmly walk across tuh de lamppost ...... and like a true pothound ..... cock his penis up against de post ...... and leisurely proceeded tuh relieve himself ...... in full view of the people in the cars (traffic) behind him!!! ..... de mongrel jus went about his business ..... like is nobody's business ....... on a @#$%^&* public road!!! ...... imagine I had enuff time ...... tuh locate meh handbag ..... find meh camera in de handbag ...... turn it orn ....... wait fuh de lens tuh come out ...... wait fuh de view tuh 'focus' ....... and ..... was able tuh snap a couple!!! ..... dat is how long de mutt was peein for ....... while I just had tuh wait fuh him tuh finish ..... cuz ah couldn't go nowhere!!!
It immediately dawned on me ...... what I would do ....... if I were a boy ...... cuz if I were a boy ........ my penis woulda be a VVIP one ...... and it woulda certainly get more respect dan dat ...... my penis woulda also been trained tuh know ..... dat he is to accept nothing but the best ...... and that doin dat nastiness ...... is just ..... well ...... nasty ...... and gross ....... and stink ....... and disgusting ........ and inconsiderate ....... and ...... AGAINST THE LAW!!!
What breed ...... or class of human ..... could so easily do dat kinda shit ...... do they have no shame ..... or broughtupsy ....... and how come a female ...... could wait til dey find ah toilet ..... is it cuz we do our Kegels ...... and our muscles are stronger or sumtin ...... and we could hold it ...... or is it cuz men ...... jus like tuh abuse dey perceived penis power?! ...... treatin it like is dey passport tuh 'parade'!? ..... yuh would tink ...... dat havin a penis (wit ah head) ...... attached tuh a body (wit another head) ...... dat the thought process will double up ...... and better decisions will flow ...... well eh eh!!!
I thank God every day ....... for blessing me with a vagina yes!!!
How are we ever gonna stop people from killing (de public) ...... when we can't even stop them from peeing (in public)!!! ...... parents ..... train yuh boy chirren nah!!!
PS: Does anybody know how a smuggled cell phone works in prison ...... I mean how does the prisoner charge it ...... and talkin about smugglin cell phones into prison ...... yuh have tuh check out dis story
But is not what yuh tinkin ...... I will NEVER want to be a boy!!!
Something happened today ...... actually ....... it's something that happens nearly every day ...... but today ...... I was able to capture it ...... and ....... when I captured it ...... I wondered to myself ..... if I were a boy ...... what would I do?
Around 2:40 this afternoon ...... ah was cruising on Sierra Leone Road (Diego) ....... headin tuh de Petit Valley Main Road ..... when ....... in the distance ...... ah notice ah lil pile up ....... ah didn't want tuh believe dat is traffic ...... at dat hour of de day! ...... then ...... as I got closer ...... well ah didn't want tuh believe what was causing de pile up either!!!
Imagine dat nasty, stinkin, man below ..... like he had tuh pee sooo bad ...... dat he jus STOP his car ..... in de road (de same road dat cars have tuh drive in) ....... jump out de car ...... calmly walk across tuh de lamppost ...... and like a true pothound ..... cock his penis up against de post ...... and leisurely proceeded tuh relieve himself ...... in full view of the people in the cars (traffic) behind him!!! ..... de mongrel jus went about his business ..... like is nobody's business ....... on a @#$%^&* public road!!! ...... imagine I had enuff time ...... tuh locate meh handbag ..... find meh camera in de handbag ...... turn it orn ....... wait fuh de lens tuh come out ...... wait fuh de view tuh 'focus' ....... and ..... was able tuh snap a couple!!! ..... dat is how long de mutt was peein for ....... while I just had tuh wait fuh him tuh finish ..... cuz ah couldn't go nowhere!!!
It immediately dawned on me ...... what I would do ....... if I were a boy ...... cuz if I were a boy ........ my penis woulda be a VVIP one ...... and it woulda certainly get more respect dan dat ...... my penis woulda also been trained tuh know ..... dat he is to accept nothing but the best ...... and that doin dat nastiness ...... is just ..... well ...... nasty ...... and gross ....... and stink ....... and disgusting ........ and inconsiderate ....... and ...... AGAINST THE LAW!!!
What breed ...... or class of human ..... could so easily do dat kinda shit ...... do they have no shame ..... or broughtupsy ....... and how come a female ...... could wait til dey find ah toilet ..... is it cuz we do our Kegels ...... and our muscles are stronger or sumtin ...... and we could hold it ...... or is it cuz men ...... jus like tuh abuse dey perceived penis power?! ...... treatin it like is dey passport tuh 'parade'!? ..... yuh would tink ...... dat havin a penis (wit ah head) ...... attached tuh a body (wit another head) ...... dat the thought process will double up ...... and better decisions will flow ...... well eh eh!!!
I thank God every day ....... for blessing me with a vagina yes!!!
How are we ever gonna stop people from killing (de public) ...... when we can't even stop them from peeing (in public)!!! ...... parents ..... train yuh boy chirren nah!!!
PS: Does anybody know how a smuggled cell phone works in prison ...... I mean how does the prisoner charge it ...... and talkin about smugglin cell phones into prison ...... yuh have tuh check out dis story
LMAO.
When I lived in Trinidad, these things I never noticed, or maybe I was turning a blind eye. Or maybe I just figured it was the norm. Never did the deed myself, mind you...
I have to say, your blog is my new favourite, if only because your slant on the Trini lifestyle is so much more humourous than mine. I tend to write about the tata politicians and duncey police throw at us... but I like your
views. Heh, heh, heh.
That camera pretty handy, I'll make sure to bring mine and see if I can match the chupidness you pick up.
As an aside, did you throw ah piece ah roti at the mongrel? Just asking...
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Dat remind mih ah de story dat make de international news ah while back. Dis T&T police officer stop de people unmarked police car he was driving by de side ah de road tuh take ah quick wee-wee and somebody jump in de car and take orf oui.
Dat lamppost pee-er could have at least gorn way dong in de yard and pee. Not ideal but less classless.
And it all related tuh de cellphone in de shoe story because I believe if yuh doh enforce de laws dat address minor 'law breaking', yuh creating ah atmosphere where people go break any law dey damn well please.
God tell mih he wash he hands after in ah nearby leaking fire hydrant or something.
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Aye Anonymous ...... Welcome tuh de Scene!
..... yuh so rite eh! ...... but sad tuh say ...... we are already there ...... people have realised that there's no penalty for breaking ANY law in Trinbago ...... so anything goes ...... look de odda day ...... I was park up ..... in a car park ..... waitin fuh ah fren ..... when a car pulled into the spot next to me ..... with three occupants ...... looked like a mummy a daddy and a baby ...... the daddy came out ...... and the mummy and the baby stayed in the car ..... the baby was so cute ..... that I found myself jus gapin at dem ...... when gasp ....... de woman turns down her window ...... and throw something out ....... something white looking like paper ...... de baby now ..... in her sweet innocent babyish curiosity ...... then sticks her head out the window ...... lookin tuh see where de rubbish (her mother just trow out) land!!!! ....... now that was such a disgusting sight!!! ..... cuz what kinda example was dat adult settin fuh dat chile!?
..... and altho dat peein in public ting ..... is someting dat I don't think will ever go away (I'm being realistic) ...... at least ..... if dem men have tuh must ...... dey could use some DISCRETION ..... and be a lil more CONSIDERATE ..... doh block de whole road tuh cause traffic ...... and another ting ...... doh be lookin around smiling ...... like if is someting good yuh doing ..... or like yuh real enjoyin de pee ...... yeah ...... my boy was lookin back and smiling or smirkin ...... like as if tuh say ...... yeah ..... look at how versatile dis equipment (penis) is!!! ...... STEUPS ..... he get me so vex eh!!!
and LOL at de leakin fire hydrant ...... cuz da'is ah scene yuh doh really see nomore ...... dis rounds ..... is EVERYBODY ..... WASA #$%^&*-up!!!
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Oops. Just so yuh eh tink it have more people on de Scene dan it actually have, dat was me eh. Trying tuh enter dat blasted security code correct make mih fuhget tuh enter mih name.
One more comment on peeing in public and udder forms of solid littering? What I doh understand is dem same same people, yuh put dey baxide in somebody else country and dem is de first ones tuh obey all de rules oui.
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LOL ...... ah not surprised ..... de content really sounded like you ...... an' ah know too ..... dat it have certain tings dat you eh go miss out on addin yuh 2 cents
..... hopefully one day I'll learn how tuh figure out who is who ...... cuz if yuh doh leave yuh email ...... I'm clueless!!
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Usually, men who "just have to go" have to go because of the beer or coffee. Maybe the poor man couldn't find a parking space at KFC. Maybe he was afraid of parking his truck in a lonely spot because of the truck thieves. Maybe he gets a high from exposing himself in public. Maybe he just doesn't care.
Anyway, notice how that lamppost is rusted away and probably got that way by frequent urination.
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u know, the prisons officers should start watching those prison shows on cable if they want to know how things are being smuggled, i mean really!!
i don't even want to comment on that incident, but clearly the man have no "brought-up-cy"
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Aye Jumbie and aka_lol ...... it's so cool tuh get big-up by two of MY favourite bloggers ...... cuz de two of allyuh does also talk a high level of shit
...... but yuh know ah cyah take all de credit ...... cuz if it weren't for my Trinbago people ...... I woulda have no blog 
...... THANKS guys!
and Jumbie ...... when yuh coming tuh Trini ...... be sure tuh walk wit dat camera fuh tru ...... cuz it have real ting tuh take pictures of ...... you'll be amazed at all the changes in Trini since you were last here (4 years ago was it?) ...... and LOL ..... no ..... why waste good roti
aka_lol and Zee ....... dat man chose tuh do what he did ...... cuz people just don't care anymore ...... anyting is anyting! ..... pee whey yuh want ..... litter whey yuh want ..... cuss who yuh want ...... spit whey yuh want ...... drive how yuh want ....... bounce who yuh want ..... shoot who yuh want ...... stab who yuh want ....... go tru hard wit whatever yuh want ...... and doh study it ...... is nuttin ...... yuh safe ..... is TnT!
and Zee gyul ..... being de devil's advocate here ...... it look like dem fellas (Prisons Officers) was so damn vex ..... when de Minister of National Security say is dem self who lettin eeeeeen de cell phones ...... dat dey muzbe chain up dah whole scene ...... tuh make it look like is really NOT dem ..... and dat dey really DOES do dey job ....... I doh know ...... jus sayin dat it kinda coincidental ...... dat jus one or two days after de accusation ...... KAZAM! ..... Prisons Officers intercept ah cell phone smuggler!
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it look like dem fellas (Prisons Officers) was so damn vex ..... when de Minister of National Security say is dem self who lettin eeeeeen de cell phones ...... dat dey muzbe chain up dah whole scene ...... tuh make it look like is really NOT dem ..... and dat dey really DOES do dey job ....... I doh know ...... jus sayin dat it kinda coincidental ...... dat jus one or two days after de accusation ...... KAZAM! ..... Prisons Officers intercept ah cell phone smuggler!
You notice is not a Prisons Officer they hold, but a civilian, right? So the real culprits (aka the PO dem) still have clear track to run.
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PS: Does anybody know how a smuggled cell phone works in prison ......
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Why, just like a real one!
Like they've never heard about cell phone jammers. Those things can fit in your pocket nowadays.
About the peeing--you're just jealous!
Fear no more though:
http://www.femalefreedom.ca/
(lol)
I pee "in public" fairly regularly, but only when it's darkish out, and never where the world can see,
The bigger question is who thought it would be good to put a urinal on a *traffic island* in the *middle* of Arouca junction!?
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What is cell phone jammers?
.... and eh eh ..... I doh have no penis envy ...... when it comes tuh peein in public ...... is de indiscreet dutty manner dat most men does do it .... that bugs me ...... and LOL ...... de P-Mate debuted a couple years ago ..... fuh Carnival ...... don't know if it did well tho ...... cuz females are just not cultured tuh pee in public standing up ..... we have couth .....
PS: yuh need tuh snap dat urinal fuh meh (I doh reach Arouca)
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