Now ah know ah kyna late eh ..... cuz ah see Jumbie and Bandi done tackle some of de Chutney bacchanal ahready ..... but LAWD ..... put ah hand .... cuz ah feel ah go really hadda pelt someting .... if ah only open-up meh papers tomorrow .... an' see dat ridiculous RAVI/RIKKI story still starrin!!!

Cuz first tuh begin ...... Chutney Soca is too much shit .... tuh be gettin all dat coverage!!!

Secondly ..... Chutney Soca is sooo much shit ..... dat it doh really deserve no TWO MILLION DOLLARS as no first prize either .....

.... and thirdly ..... Chutney Soca is sooo much shit ..... dat I an' all coulda win!!! 

Yeah ..... and YOU too .....

..... cuz when de Government decided ..... dat dey was goin tuh ...... applaud dat shit ..... and award dat shit ..... wit ah whopping TWO MILLION DOLLARS .... dat was de invitation dey self .... fuh me tuh write ah Chutney ..... but I eh make de semis .... an' I eh get vex .... I eh tell nobody pelt nuttin ..... ah humble mehself .... an' ah say nex year fuh dat!

Now I actually like Rikki Jai eh .... I find Rikki Jai is ah nice humble fella .... an' ah real glad fuh him .... he get he two million .... which is quite a pretty return on de investment he made .... cuz yeah .... ah hear he went eeeeeen Bmobile (one ah he sponsor) and buy out all dey sim card ..... and give dem tuh peeps tuh vote fuh him!? .... an' is not like dat woulda cost anyting near TWO MILLION DOLLARS!!!

But .... I digress ....

Ravi B on de odda hand ..... is not an artiste dat I ever used tuh take orn .... until ah see him in Ladies First some year .... and he make meh ah believer ..... from then on ..... ah had kinda start takin note of Karma .... where Ravi B always seemed tuh me .... tuh be ah kicks man ..... he seemed tuh have a good sense of humour .... and they (the band) seemed tuh be de new up-and-coming hott-shit band .....

Fast forward tuh 2011 .... add TWO MILLION DOLLARS tuh de mix ..... and voila ..... artistes have apparently instantly turned into jackasses ....

Cuz you had tuh be an ass .... tuh tell partyin Trinis .... and most likely DRUNK Trinis ..... tuh PELT TING at de stage if dey find you shoulda win!!!

Den .... on de next side of dat .... TRINIS had tuh be asses too .... tuh really pelt ting .... cuz Grrrrrr ..... how dotish are we as a people .... tuh just blindly (and I guess drunkenly) follow some dotish instruction .... from some Chutney Soca artiste ..... who jus sing some dotish shit .... wit some dotish props .... wearing ah dotish fire-burnin R jacket ....

Geeeeeeeez!!!!

Since Sunday night .... is only Ravi dis .... Ravi dat .... everybody only puttin in dey two cents about Ravi and his behaviour ..... writing letter tuh de editor .... puttin comments on de web .... reporters writin articles in de newspapers .... and even Government Ministers ..... like Gypsy .... sayin oh .... Ravi B was so wrong tuh incite violence ..... and den de next one ..... ah tink is Roodilal whatever ..... on de TV tonight .... trying tuh make some stupid joke or pun .... sayin dat it wasn't Ravi B's KARMA tuh win (or some shit like dat) .... and how he believe ..... dat Ravi B committed some kinda crime .... and how he should be dealt with .... just like how de law dealin wit Machel and frenz (i.e. Zan, Benjai and Kernel) ..... den it have others who sayin dat he should get ban from entering any future competitions ..... blah, blah, blah ....

.... and I just want tuh vomit ....

Cuz don't get me wrong eh ..... what Ravi B did ..... was phenomenally STUPID .... and I eh condonin it ..... but what about the thousands or hundreds of STUPID TRINBAGONIANS .... who actually responded??!! ..... ah wonder if he had tell dem tuh go jump off ah cliff ..... if dey woulda do dat too?!

Now I know dat Ravi B will probably real suffer fuh dat one act of stupidity eh ..... cuz I done start tuh hear talk about how people cancellin him fuh shows an' ting ..... but ..... I believe that he has truly seen and realised dat is real shit he do ..... an' ah hopin ..... dat now dat he done give about 10 apology .... dat he learn from de experience ..... and move on .....

But what about de ress ..... what about de STUPID TRINBAGONIANS who pelt de shit ..... will they also see the error of their ways ..... and take some responsibilty fuh de whole fiasco ..... or will they maintain their STUPIDITY ..... fuh de Destra and Machel feud ..... in de odda two million dollar monster ..... de SOCA MONARCH!?

I guess we'll just have tuh wait and see ....